1. Breathe

    Friday, October 22, 2010
    By johnny

    Take a deep breath.
    And understand that it is the air you're breathing
    that's keeping you alive.

    On average a person breathes 24,000 times a day.

    Go ahead, take another deep breath.
    Each breath you breathe tells the story of a God who so loved the world.
    What if the air is not transparent, but rather BRIGHT RED.

    Count your blessings in every breath.
    You have at least 24,000 reasons to give thanks every day.

    johnny
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  2. Quit

    Sunday, October 17, 2010
    By johnny
    Ever been in a marathon or a long run wanting to quit mid-way? I ain't a quitter but the thought of stopping what I have been doing has been ringing in my head like an alarm clock - loud and annoying. I went to Bridge last night and had a wonderful time praying. I was immensely touched by His love as we held hand in prayers. Tonight I went to E Square and we talked about repentance. I love how people interact with each other and the atmosphere was filled with joy.

    I don't understand. I am just confused. Why is it that no one would have time for Wave? Was it the right decision to have tonight off because no one could or wanted to go to the conference in Irvine? I'm probably not suitable to be leading a home group if people don't even feel "at home" when we gather, right? Or could it be me? I probably should care for more people and make more phone calls. This is my fourth year at UCSD, and it's not until now that I really feel that it sucks. It really does. I cannot even care for people face to face and hang out with them, and they expect to show up at "my" house on the most eventful night of the week? I don't think so. I hate being not able to play badminton three times a week anymore because I'm stuck in San Diego. I hate not being able to spend time with my family and friends because I have to be in SD. Weekends are not really weekends. There's not enough time on the weekends to see people. Wave, sometimes workshops, and Sunday service takes away the entire day. Then, for the 90th time, I head back to San Diego. At least someone's with me to keep me company.

    School has been just okay but I think I have never felt such a dislike toward school academics. I don't know why. Right now my head feels like exploding and my heart feels like to rest a bit. My spirit is so willing to come to Jesus. Lord, make me more like You, Jesus. This is the feeling I had back in February when first started a long break from any ministry-related work. I just want to drive my head into a wall. I want to change. I desire a breakthrough. And I seek You, Jesus, because I KNOW Your strength is made perfect when I am weak and Your grace is abundant.

    I am not a failure. I am Your Son. Come and wash over me and make me white as snow. Save me from falling. I want more of You in my life. Help me here, Lord. I can't, but You can.

    Johnny
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  3. West Africa: TOGO

    Saturday, October 2, 2010
    By johnny
    I've shared what I received from this trip with people verbally here and there for the past month or so, but I've never really typed it down. Not that I am lazy to type it all out...not. Anyhow, so here it goes:

    In my previous post, written on the morning of the African voyage, I asked myself why I was going. There could be so many answers such as Because we're going to record some sick tracks, Because Luke is coming along, Because Jack and Annie asked me (did they?), or Because I just want to go. Maybe the closest answer would be that I would really like to go on a mission trip at least once every year since my life-changing trip to Cambodia last summer.

    @ 3rd Annual River of Life Youth Conference West Africa
    (Click it to join the PARTY!)

    The first morning as we were having breakfast together, each of us shared our various expectations of this trip and what we wanted to see or gain from this journey. I did not know what to expect besides the mission to record some original songs from this part of the world, take it back, produce them and let the world hear the sound. I also was really expecting to see some crazy healing and miracles to take place during our stay here in Lome, Togo.

    Celebrating Pastor Jame's Birthday! Delicious meal!
    (Click it to see the A-Team!)

    In General
    During the first day, we visited the local prison, went on a radio station, and also performed "Friend of God" in French and promoted the youth conference on the most popular TV talk show here in Togo. The youth conference took place over the next four days. And I have never been so physically tired and drenched like I had during this African trip. Every day is jam-packed with things to do, especially to record their songs, take loads of pictures, video recording, speak at workshops... But it was so worth all the sweat (literally!). I love how they worship God -- their love for Him displayed on their countenances. Just seeing their hunger and desire to receive drove me on to give out everything I have, knowing I might not have much to offer but my poorly-spoken French, my hugs, and my love for these beautiful people on the other side of the world.

    Annie with a lady healed of stomach pain right after prayer!
    (Click it to see the resemblance of their love.)

    People in Togo
    Lome is the capital of Togo, though not as "modern" as Ghana or Benin's capitals, people DO use internet, they DO surf the web and send emails at "internet cafes". I should not have presumed that the people in Africa are not educated and poor and have to walk miles to draw water from wells. In this city, people do get educated, and it only costs an university student $80 USD to to receive a year of college education! Yes, most of the people in the country are still living in the villages (which I will share about later in the post), living day after day under harsh conditions; however, seeing these educated youth and young adults at the conference, I saw them as the hope of the future of Togo, and their contribution to this nation will then provide for their fellow Togolese living in poor villages.

    @ village, this guy remembered Jack
    because he went to the Youth Conference!
    (Click it to feel the joy through this picture.)

    Deliverance Session
    Speaking of signs, wonders, and miracles, something really interesting happened during the morning session on the last day of the conference. To be honest, I was really expecting to lay hands of the sick, blind, deaf, mute, lame, and see God's healing power fall upon them and thus set them free from these bondages. However, I saw nothing of these sort AT ALL. (I know, what a bummer!) God had something else planned (of course, always better than our plan..). During that session, pastor Clement was sharing (in their local language, EWE, with English and also French live translation), and he called two people to come up and sit on the stage. I thought he was going to honor them, but after he finished his sharing and gave out an alter call, I finally knew why he called these two people up on the stage.

    Then, for the next hour and half, I felt like I was watching the movie "Furious Love" right in front of my eyes -- they were having a deliverance session on a hot, sweaty Saturday morning. There were people on the stage and off the stage being delivered. Many Africans would worship different idols and seek counseling from witchdoctors or practice voodoo rituals, and thus trading their souls, even the lives of their families with the enemy without fulling knowing what they had done.

    One of the two people called on the stage was a young girl, probably 18 years of age, needed four adults to hold her down so that the pastor could anoint her with oil. And eventually, they even cut off her hair! Later on we found out why: the demonic spirits wouldn't let her go and they were still clinging onto her hair, which let to freedom, and a free haircut. That was one of the most intense time I have ever been in: people screaming, shaking, dancing, worshiping, spinning, but in the end, all things had to bow down to the Lordship of God, the King of Kings, and the Holy Spirit. In the US, we hold powerful night services, but in Africa, who cares if it is bright or dark, God is the same all the time! Total awesomeness.

    After that crazy session, I realized that the people in Africa must see signs, wonders, miracles ALL THE TIME because the battle in the spirit is so real, and they are definitely even more experienced in praying for these crazy things. So my craving for healing, signs, wonders, and deliverance stopped after having a live deliverance movie played right in front of my eyes. It was certainly quite an interesting experience that I rarely would encounter here in the West.

    Luke's our lady-magnet... check out his dance moves!
    (Click it to see his muscles/her beautiful smile.)

    Village Experience
    Very much like what we would see on TV--poor villages lacking all kinds of resources with villagers walking for miles to retrieve water from wells. It's a different world out there. Words cannot describe how in need these people are, yet I see something more precious in them that I do not have: DESPERATION. I use the word "precious" because I realize the way they pray and their mentality while praying are coming from the deepest part of their soul. They understand EXACTLY what it means to be "hungry", to be "thirsty", and thus asking God to "give them this day their daily bread" is not some words they have to reiterate before their meals. I see their faith to believe because they have nothing else to lose and no one else to look to.

    I shared with one of the young adults from the church in the city, "You know, Julius, this is the place where Jesus would visit. I finally see the reason why." The villages is the main harvest field--many believed in voodoo, witchcraft, or Islam also because they want to have something to hold on to. And we can offer that firm Foundation that always stands, a Tower of refuge to hide, Cloud by day, Fire by night, and a Well that never runs dry.

    Of course the van had to get stuck in the mud...
    Can't have a fun trip without some mud-fun!
    (Click it to see how I single-handedly pushed it out... not)

    Last But Not Least
    Despite all the workshops, all the visits, and all the recording sessions, what I could give out was actually one thing--LOVE. Who cares about the language barriers, culture collisions, and reality shocks? Luke shared with me after the trip that he loves to LOVE the people in West Africa, and he found a way to love beyond words, and to see the smiles on their faces and just to know that they are loved is enough. I can't agree with him more. After all, my primary mission is not to preach, nor teach, nor provide... these are all great but they come secondary to LOVE, which is my commandment. My friends and family, do you love to LOVE? My encouragement for everyone is that don't wait until you are ready, or when you can finally speak a foreign language to GO, we sure weren't ready (hah...) for whatever was going to happen, but out willing hearts wanted to go.

    Grace, Wenshian, and James telling YOU to GO!
    Well... probably just James =D
    (Click it to see Jame's awesomeness close-up.)

    So there you have it--my long entry summarizing my voyage to a land of harvest, beauty, and God's workmanships created to do His will and advance His Kingdom upon the earth. I give thanks to God, who provided me and our team with financial blessings from our friends and family (that's YOU!) all over the nations. Thank you for your prayer support also... it's definitely a battlefield there and your prayers empowered us to keep walking in the frontline!

    And the Magnificent Seven (myself included): James, Wenshian, Grace, Jack, Annie, and Luke. Though the trip was physically tiring, we still managed to have some fun moments at the villages, tranquil moments at the pool, and stressful moments at the airport. I love you all, and I learned a lot from you during the trip (sweet magic tricks, Luke...)! I can't wait for my next mission trip. Now... it's time to work on some amazing African music! Stay tuned for the West African Sound~


    Be blessed by God and be a blessing to others!
    Johnny

    ps. Dubai Layover
    Our team stopped by Dubai for an extra day during our transfer flight back to the States. Going from the lowest places on the planet (African villages) to the richest city in the world was quite an experience for all of us. There are people suffering, and there are also people taking a vacation at a seven-star hotel, and I felt that God's telling me that they are no difference in His eyes--all His children, all His beloved, and I should be content and thankful for everything I have.

    View from our beautiful hotel on the 40th floor. Incredible.
    (Click it to see how twisted this building looks. Ha.)

    Be joyful always.
    Pray without ceasing.
    Give thanks in all circumstances,
    For this is God's will for You in Christ Jesus.
    -1 Thessalonians 5:16~18-

    Hate to say goodbye to Togo...
    Thus we all had some FAN MILK before we departed!
    We'll be back just to have s'more of those!
    (Fan Milk is the most amazing milk ice cream ever...OMG)

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  4. Togo, West Africa

    Monday, August 16, 2010
    By johnny

    It's 5:05am and I'm pretty much packed and ready to go on this once-in-a-lifetime journey to the far, far away land of West Africa. I still have that question ringing in my ear: Why am I going to Togo? I think one of the answers is that ever since my Cambodia trip last summer, I've made a decision to go on a oversea mission trip at least once a year. And the other reason could be that I want to have that heart for the nations. I will never, ever forget that afternoon prayer meeting with the local missionaries in Cambodia where I could not stop bawling and pounding the floor with a heart aching for the land. I can still remember that intensity and the burning within as I type.

    I remember back in February I really came to God and ask Him to purify my heart and my whole being, knowing that trials were sure to come. Now, six months later, my heart has certainly felt lighter, and since my stepping back into the worship leading rotation, I've felt another level of freedom in worship which I've never encountered before during corporate worship times. There's so much to learn, so much challenges to face. Like Jack's been saying, leaders should always take initiatives and CAST VISIONS. CAST VISIONS. CAST VISIONS. CAST VISIONS.

    My heart is very excited for the next two weeks and how my life will be once again never the same! O Jesus come, I want You. Holy Spirit, thanks for living in me, though sometimes could be a rough place to live in, but whenever that happens, Your joy always kicks in and make all things new.

    Je suis prêt! On y va!
    I'm ready! Here we go!

    johnny
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  5. Father's Day - 8/8

    Father's Day falls on the eighth day of the eighth month for Chinese people because the word "eight" sound very much like "Dad" in Chinese (and in many other languages). A week ago after the Sunday service, the worship band gathered with Jack and had a short meeting mainly because for the past month or two the worship on Sundays were not "there". We all knew in our spirits that something's missing. But honestly, I didn't know what exactly was missing... maybe I'm not sensitive enough to the Holy Spirit? Maybe the band didn't click, or because of the lack of practice? Jack mentioned to the worship leaders that song picking is very important because all songs would have a better and powerful flow if they are surrounded by a common theme that connect each other and sometimes in response.
    So the songs were about God as a Father and the Love of the Father that heals, delivers, and set people free as they realize that they do not have to do a thing to receive the Father's love because they inherit whatever Jesus had when they accepted Him in the first place.

    As I was going through the songs, many more songs caught my attention, so this was the final list:

    I Know Who I Am
    All For Love
    In Your Presence
    Child of God
    Bring Restoration

    During our band practice in the morning, we spent the last 20 minutes just blessing God and give Him all the honor, glory, and praise with our playing and our voices. It was one of the most powerful moments for sure. I did not know what was coming. As we started to sing I Know Who I Am, somehow I felt like God is going to restore identity in people's hearts once again as they sing this song over themselves. As we started singing All For Love, definitely an Impact all-time favorite song with beautifully written lyrics on the love of Father and the Cross, the love of God started to be poured out all over the room, and His presence was so tangable, so thick. And it kept on increasing as we sing "In Your presence, all fear is gone" and the simple, prayerful chorus:

    Father You're all I need, my soul's sufficiency
    You're my strength when I am weak
    The love that carries me
    Your arms enfold me, till I am only
    A child of God

    Once again the song focuses on the identity of God as a Father and us as children, and our need for Him to come be our strength and carry us through the storms in His embrace. As I was considering whether we should close with this song or sing Bring Restoration, somehow my spirit started to declare freedom in this place as we sang a little new song to God, and He used Bring Restoration to break chains and loose bondages. It was beautiful. He is beautiful.
    Your son, johnny
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blind eyes open you only live once.
open your eyes.
His love never fails. For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works,
which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.
~Ephesians 2:10~

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